A Wedding

A wedding should be about the couple getting married. It should be special and unique to them. The wedding that I felt fit this description the most was my son Evan's wedding.

Evan has been a theatre person since his freshman year of high school. While we thought he would be perfect for the stage, he found his passion behind the scenes, working on the Stage and Building Crew and the Running Crew. He went on to study theatre in college, where he met his wife in of course, a theatre class. At the time, both of them were in other relationships, but one fateful night at a Halloween party, they reconnected.

Being a technical theatre director, Evan had the connections to pull off their theatre-themed wedding. The ceremony took place in a high school theater. The ceremony was made up of monologues and songs from musicals. The lights, sound, and filming were run by his former students. The stage manager, also a former student, flew in from New York where she was working professionally, just to assist with the day. From a stuck zipper on a bridesmaid's dress to a broken boutonniere to wasp stings to keeping everyone on time, we kept her busy and she kept everything running smoothly. After all, rehearsals do not prepare everyone for everything that can and will happen on the big day.

As with many days, this one was happy, yet I was sad. I kept thinking of the people who should be there, but weren't. Three important people were missing. My parents helped me raise Evan. I was a single mom for his first seven years. I lived at home. Evan was the first grandchild and held a very special place in their hearts, as they did and do in his. Both passed away within eight weeks of each other in 2006. Somehow it didn't seem right that they weren't with us at this important event. They would have been so proud of him.

The other missing person was my birth mom, Dee. She was also a theatre person and would have loved this wedding. She had passed just a few months earlier. Although we only had ten months from the time I met her until her passing, she had attended one of Evan's shows in the very theater where Evan was getting married.

I knew that Evan was also missing his grandparents-and not only those three, but his paternal grandparents as well. My in-laws were in poor health and in their 90's and couldn't attend. Only my birth mom's husband was able to attend. Evan was so pleased that he would be there and made sure that he had a special place to sit.

The day before the wedding, I had given him a medal with all six of his grandparents' initials engraved on it. He wore it around his neck.

After the ceremony, I had a moment that I will remember forever. It was the first time that all of my siblings were in the same space. My older brother Mark, who I grew up with, was finally going to meet my birth siblings, Bridgid, Chris, and Marty. I knew that it might be the only time I would have all of them together. After quick introductions, I asked everyone to pose for one photo. Other families have many pictures of all of the kids, but not me. I just wanted one. My sister-in-law took the picture in the back of the theater. To this day it is one of my most treasured possessions.

The reception was a typical open bar wedding reception. We closed the five-hour reception with some family and friends singing together on the dance floor. Luckily there was a shuttle back to the hotel where we spent the night. The next morning while the newlyweds headed to Log Heaven in Gatlingburg for their honeymoon, the rest of the family got in a van and drove to Orlando for a much needed vacation.